"Some things never change" by Robert Francis

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_JkHbgE8_w&feature=youtube_gdata_player

An Imprint on Life

First off.. who even makes New Years resolutions and actually keeps them?! Lol I guess I dont,

anyhow, here I am again for my "yearly" blog post! :) 

Today I was working at our little family company, helping out my dad, when he asked me to take care of some papers that had been sitting on his desk for some time.  So I picked up the papers, sat down at my desk and began to work.  The first thing I noticed was the dates on these so called "papers that have been there awhile." The dates started from 1976 through 1981 and so on, 1976?!!! "Dad these have been sitting on your desk for years.. before the day I was even born!" I had given him a hard time.. talk about "being there awhile", but as I looked further I noticed the handwriting right away, it was my grandmothers. As I sat there looking at it, studying it with everything in me I began to cry. It was the strangest thing the emotions this so called handwriting was causing and then it hit me... Oh how I miss her handwriting, her hands, her laugh, her smile and everything about her! I wanted her here with me again, to just sit and hold her hand and talk about life. It also hit me, how incredible it was that this little company my family had built from the ground up, was still so successful and had been ran by my grandparents and many relatives before them, for years.  As I continued working, I also ran across my uncle Franks handwritten invoices he had ordered and wrote before he passed away. I missed them both so much, they had held these papers time and time again. I found myself putting them up to my chest as to give them a big hug.  I closed my eyes and thought how amazing it was to me that just their handwriting alone suddenly made me feel so close to them for a moment. These two people in my life were some of the best I will ever know and I was very close to both of them, being home has made me realize how GREATLY I miss them both. I always will, but today I realized that I appreciate this family company of ours just a little bit more and also our handwriting. I guess you could say it's a small "imprint", a piece of life, that you get to leave behind when you go. 

Ahhh, its a New Year!

I made one New Years Resolution this year and it was to blog. I'll start tomorrow.. ;)

Twinkle Twinkle my lil star!

Ok I know, its been FOREVER since I've posted about all our exciting adventures over the past few months.. we've had so much going on- moved, new home, new town, we both started school and basically rearranged our whole life. Consequently, Ive been so busy I haven't got a second to blog about any of it, heck I havent even got a chance to watch, literally, ONE episode of my favorite TV shows- Greys, Office, Modern Family, Amazin Race.. the list goes on. The only thing I have time for these days regarding a TV is Monsters or Shrek, other than that, Im busy studying and playing mom so theres barely any time to jump on to my computer. Im going to do better though, so in the meantime, here's just a small post of some videos I have to share because my baby is no longer a baby....  shes talking and as smart as can be, she's turning in to my lil' "BF"! She really likes to copy mama right now as well, for instance, yesterday, I found her running from our living room to our kitchen while shouting "oh shoot" as she picked up a bowl from the table and pretended to stir it like crazy with a fork.. Ya, she's just re-inacting mama a couple hours earlier, when I had realized I left the Alfredo sauce burning on the oven burner for almost an hour as we were playing in the living room,  I jumped up and ran in to the kitchen while shouting "oh shoot!" as I was rescuing the tasty Alfredo sauce awaiting our dinner that night. But even more, her favorite thing now is when shes being naughty and I say "L, I'm gonna count to 3"... rather, before I can even begin to count, she starts counting it for me and says "1,2,3" then points her finger at me sternly and says, "time out wight now mama!"  She's also caught on to being really cute at 1am after she comes running across the kitchen floor to crawl in to bed with me... she knows if shes absolutely adorable at that hour, mama will let her stay up and/or in bed with her all night.  So thats our story these days.. shes putting mama in time out, trying to do her own hair and learning how to work me over to get whatever she wants and I think that's how you know your baby is no longer a baby!  

"L" singing Twinkle Twinkle lil Star

 

I found her "washing" and trying to do her own hair...

 

you ARE my sunshine baby girl!

and such is the story of my life...

Just as I make up my mind to officially move home & go back to school to get my masters, break it to the baby daddy & call my landlords, I get an email from a company actually seeking me out! So I thought why not? I'll go in & interview, see what they have to say. So I did.. & to make a long story short, an hour after I left they called me to come back tomorrow to meet the CEO of the company. So I did again... & same story about an hour after I left they had emailed me an offer! Well now back to square one on the life changing decision I've been tryin to make for the past month. After some deep thinking, a long list of pros and cons, & friendly advice, I realized that the list was pretty much even across the board except one little thing..... my daughter. All the pros for her consisted of Monticello, family, more time spent w/mom, playing with cousins, aunts, uncles & pa and nana of course! I know she would be so happy down there, my question was... would I? Regardless I felt that my happiness didn't matter that much comparatively speaking to hers, she IS and always will be most important in my life. So I emailed them back, denying their offer. Now, its just a matter of days before the big move & I am actually excited about it, I have big plans for that little town.. & am sure to cause some chaos with all the visitors Im expecting! lol. But once again, just like clock work, I recieved another email from this company asking me what amount would "entice" me to change my mind & stay?  Man, they really want me at this point, which I dont blame them because of the things I can offer their 3 different companies they want me over. So, back to square one.. ugh. really? Ok ending result, I shot for the moon & decided if they give it to me I cannot pass it up or the money, could change mine & Londons life..  At the same time, if they deny it then I feel thats finally my answer & Im back to stickin with the "plan" & moving forward & outta here! If Im being honest, I really do want outta here, my friends & I say this all the time, "utah county is not real life." All the men are mostly the same, the girls .. same competitive crazyness for any guys attention, etc. Theres just way too many single mormons in this town if u ask me... lol but it was still my home for the past 10 years so it will be a lil bittersweet for me.  I love my friends up here & will miss them very much, & of course, I am finally meeting a few guys who are really great & I m exicted about.. one of them I've seen atleast 3 times this week & its only Wed! He says we'll "take turns" traveling to see each other though.. so that could keep it interesting! :) Ahhh, doesn't life always seems to work this way, but its time for a change of life for London and I. So I've left it up to fate at this point... and now just waiting to see what fate has in store for me! Hopefully I find out today, since I need to start packin! In the meantime this is where London & I like to go when we need a good dose of nature to help us ponder our life decisions, so we spent Sunday up at Cascade Springs...

Wearin' your bells & whistles!

This past weekend was the "big" 24th of July celebration in my hometown, Monticello. So I packed up & headed down south for the weekend. To explain a little about being from a small town... here's the deal, everyone talks.. everyone looks or watches.. & everyone loves a good rumor! Moving on.. I had promised my BF, Kenneth, that I would come & make an appearance for the 24th with him. He had exclaimed lets show up, "wearin' our bells & whistles!" We love to give them something to talk about, so most often, we dress to the hilt just to "drag main" or whatever other small town events we may be going to.. Lol.  If you know me at all, you know, Im never on time, always fashionably late whether I want to be or not, so as always,  pulling in to town late, I was throwin on my clothes & make up in the car when my mom looks over at me & says "you're wearing that?!" I reply, "of course I am... you dont like it?" She says, "well everyone will be watching you thats for sure"  in her more serious voice. I laughed & said, mom you need to lighten up a bit, youre getting so serious in your old age! ;) We need to laugh & have fun, who cares if we're a bit late, not a big deal & who cares what people think about my outfit, Im not worried about it, so neither should you.." Well just you know, I got that statement from her about 4 more times throughout the weekend.. "your wearing that?!" My response, "I promised Kenneth I'd show up with my bells & whistles on.. & these high heels are my bells!" 

I found it quite entertaining, but more seriously just as I explained to my mother..  I realized when it was I began to "not care" what people thought, assumed or said about me, started the day I moved out of my house & temple marriage a few years back. Then more so after I got pregnant with my daughter London & my boyfriend wanted nothing to do with us or marriage any longer. Then a bit more after I started dating a man, many thought was a bad choice given his circumstance, past & "red flags" .. well I wanted to make my own call after getting to know him rather. Then a lil more after I lost my job, my break up & struggles in life had fallen apart all at the same time.  I have realized it doesn't matter what people say or think about you honestly. The trick is .. remembering this during those hard times. If you are happy with yourself & who you are & the ones you love, the rest.. doesn't really matter. Going through struggles the past couple years, I've heard many different things being said or assumed & I can't think of one that was really accurate or true. Reality is, most have no clue what they're actually talking about, therefore you cant let it affect or change who you are or feel everyday. I guess I grew a hard, somewhat stubborn skin through my trials over the past few years. Im ok with that because I realized if Im giving life my best right now, today, regardless of mistakes or loss in the past & am happy with who I am, how I look, dress or am living then that's what truly matters. I feel Im a good person with a big heart.. which sometimes gets me in to trouble & often makes me care more than I should or sometimes makes me feel its impossible to let go until I've made things right, but mostly it represents who I am.  I am completely ok with who I am & even who Im not.  There will always be people making assumptions about you or your choices & what they think youre doing, but that doesn't matter cause more likely than not, they dont really know.  We can't live our lives letting others opinions of us bring us down.  I believe if you stop watching, assuming or making judgements on others & rather start listening & actually "hearing" what they may or may not be saying, you might understand them better. Lets be better people & stop assuming things about others, stop listening to things being said or making our own judgments. If you really care about someone & the way they may or may not be living their lives, talk to them. Show them that you "care", believe what it is they are saying & if you dont, then pretend to & be thoughtful & supportive regardless. Be more empathetic & observant to friends, family or even strangers. Its not our place to judge or make calls on someones life, & most importantly, keep smiling & dont let it stress or bring you down. What others believe or think, is not important, whats important is YOU & what you feel & know about yourself. Ive learned this the hard way, but always seems the minute I stop letting other people affect me, the happier I am. Like I said to my mom, lets stop being so serious all the time & laugh together more, dont let the lil things bother or discourage you. Our time here is priceless, so enjoy the ones you love, the moments you share & even the heartache without the added worry of others opinions or expectations of you. No one is perfect, but everyone IS important. Dont be the person adding to someone else's pain or problem, be better, even silent at times & learn more by not only listening, but actually "hearing." 
That bein' said, I'll share some less serious stuff & the fun I had this weekend. By the end of my trip, my mom was even making more of an effort to not worry so much about others opinions & the things we can't control... she was actually laughing & joking right along side Kenneth & I !

The Touch of Good Music

I don't know about anyone else, but I LOVE music. It heals me in some way, defines me & always makes me happy. I can't be driving in the car without my ipod turned up full blast & even better, London is the same way. Oh boy, is she upset if she's in the car with no music playing in the background. But that started way back in the womb... the very first time I ever felt her kick was when I was driving in my car with my music turned up too loud & singing out of tune. There it was.. kick kick & from that moment on that's the only time I could get her moving, was to the music! Like mother like daughter they say.. Anyhow, Im always looking for new artists, downloading songs & "shazamming" away on my iphone no matter where Im at. I love all types of music & if u get me started talking about my favorites, next thing you know you'll have a full playlist copied on to a cd for you to take with you as you go.  Lol, ask any man who's been over in the past month?! Regardless, I'm pretty sure they've all left happy about it!  One of my all time favorites is Brandi Carlile. She's amazing, I love all her stuff and she's always the first one playing in my car and the first one to start off London and I's day... we turn up the music and dance away in the kitchen as we're making breakfast. This is a ritual for us, something to get us up and dancin with a smile on our faces to begin the day. Also I get to see Brandi in concert July 11th, I'm stoked and can barely wait to hear her live!  Another one of my most recent favs is Greg Laswell. His music is awesome, but one song in particular I have been playing over & over. It is called "It Comes & Goes in Waves."  I love this song for a number of reasons, mainly because its true, life does come and go in waves as does love.  Another reason, I adore this song, is because it touches or speaks to everyone differently. There is something for everyone to take,  for instance, to me, this song represents a number things.. mainly heartbreak and loss or what it feels like to be lonely in some way. Now let me tell you the great part to this song...  it also represents love and hope. A hope for something better. someone better, and a hope and comfort in knowing that you are not alone, ever.  Someone is always thinking about you in some way.  Remember no matter how hard life may seem at times, there is always hope and love and others who are there too. Dont give up on love and the hope for better, dont become bitter & tainted, we all go through hard things, we all have trials and heartbreaks, but at the end of the day, we're all still here helping one another through and becoming better people because of it. So enjoy the lyrics below & before long it'll be one of ur favs too! I'll end by saying, I hope all is well in the world tonight! Enjoy xo.

"It Comes & Goes in Waves" by Greg Laswell:

This one's for the lonely
The ones that seek and find
Only to be let down
Time after time
 
This one's for the torn down
The experts at the fall
Come on friends get up now
You're not alone at all

And this part was for her
This part was for her
This part was for her
Does she remember?

It comes and goes in waves, i....

This one's for the faithless
The ones that are surprised
They are only where they are now
Regardless of their fight

This one's for believing
If only for it's sake
Come on friends get up now
Love is to be made

And this part was for him

This part was for him
This part was for him

Does he remember?

It comes and goes in waves,
I am only led to wonder why
It comes and goes in waves
I am only led to wonder why
Why I try

This is for the ones who stand
For the ones who try again
For the ones who need a hand
For the ones who think they can

It comes and goes in waves,
I am only led to wonder why
It comes and goes in waves
I am only led to wonder why
while I try

More of "The Crazy Life," starring Kim & London..

Gosh, I really need to be better at this blogging stuff! But it seems in our crazy life, I can't keep up with it and many of you are probably thinking.. busy? ur unemployed?! haha but the truth is I seem to be busier than I've ever been, running around trying to keep up with my little toddler. She is no longer a baby.. its sad and fun all at the same time! We have so much to share recently, our trip to Vancouver, BC,  Londons surgery, a recent purchase and our new future plans, but tonight I only have a few moments, so I'll just share a few pics and pieces of our recent adventures in "The crazy life of Kim and London!"

I took London to the zoo the day before her surgery to help with "the pain".. and when I say pain, I mean mama's pain of course! This is her & her cousin Cache sharing the bench

 

London loved the monkeys.. and they are secretly my favorite too

  

Riding the choo choo train! Doesn't she have the best smile?!

 

Hangin w/the elephant that blows water all over & makes some loud sound London was petrified of..

   

This is how Ness found us, after she lost us..  oh just hangin out being silly in our elephant hats. 

 

Camping out in our living room in "L's" new princess tent. Yes, we've done this atleast 3 times since!  

And of course.. getting to the swimming pool as much as we can!

My baby is no longer a baby.. her new bed..

This is what I did while London was gone to CA with her dad for a week, "redid" her bedroom & she LOVED it.  "cuuutttee mama cute.." all she could say when she first saw it, it was adorable to say the least.

London reading her book on her new bed, she is obsessed with it & all the owls mama "whoo whoot" she says. Cant believe how big she is getting!  

 

"Smile"

I started out my day on the rd driving, feeling so content & happy. I rolled the window down & let the wind blow through my fingers as I sang at the top of my lungs (something I only do when I'm alone, I can't carry a tune!) I had a new direction, a new goal & I was excited! I looked in my rear view mirror at my beautiful daughter sleeping peacefully & I smiled. As I drove on, a thought kept coming to my mind... always "smile". It hit me so strongly- no matter the situation, how sad, disappointed or mad I might be, whether at her or someone & something else in life, it was important to always end with a smile for her to see. And right then & there in my car, I dedicated myself- when she wakes up or goes to sleep, I will be there smiling, when one of us walks through or out the door I will smile, when she trys my patience or makes a wrong decision, yes I will be upset (not claiming to be mary poppins here) but I will make sure the end result is a smile, with all the love in the world. I realized it doesn't matter how mad I may be, why, what or how hard... I want her to remember, regardless, her mother still smiled. Lets face it, its a hard world these days, our kids need to know they are loved & the one thing that makes us smile everyday. They need to feel they matter & make the world a better place. Smile to show them our strength. Smile so they always know someone loves them no matter what, when or where! As they say, a smile can go a long way, even coming from a stranger when your having a bad day, it makes a difference.  I decided today to teach my children its important to smile even when they dont feel like it, by showing them. One day, I want London to remember her mothers smile & know how happy she made me, no matter what life threw at us. 
I wish the ending to this story was as bright as it began, but unfortunatley after I arrived home, unpacked & put London to bed, I opened up my laptop & received this email.  My heart instantly broke & the tears started to fall as sadness came over me. I can't even begin to imagine what my friend & mother to this beautiful little boy, must be feeling & I found myself saying a prayer. As I said amen, the feeling came over me again & I remembered Bek's smile. He was always, always smiling & no matter how bad a day I was having, whenever Chelsea brought him in to the office, I couldn't help but just smile & light up around him. I believe he taught & inspired me today. Bek's smile & glow touched my heart & is the one thing I remember most.  He truly touched everyone around him with his "smile." 

Beck J Rippy

2007 - 2010

In memory of Beckster, the sweetest soul we've known.

---

OBITUARY
Beck Rippy was born on November 12, 2007 to Tyler and Chelsea Rippy of American Fork, Utah. He rejoined his Heavenly Father on April 23, 2010, due to complications with pneumonia.

Beck was, in every sense of the word, a blessing. The perpetual light he carried with him could find its way into even the hardest of hearts. Despite a few developmental challenges, this small boy was able to communicate the love and courage his soul contained.

Beck's happiness, his playful spirit, his angelic countenance, and his teasing smile were contagious to every person who came in contact with him. To see his face would be to look into something greater than all of us-- a peek into heaven.

Beck is survived by his proud parents, his adoring brother Evan (9) and his doting sister Kate (7). He is also survived by his grandparents Jim and Sue Rippy and Randy and Kerry Stenson. His great-grandparents, his many aunts, uncles, and cousins will greatly miss him, and will forever be affected by the short but powerful role Beck played in their lives. We love our Beckster.

Funeral services for Beck will be held Tuesday, April 27, 2010 at 11:00 am at the Hillcrest 2nd LDS Ward Chapel located at 1120 North 150 West, American Fork, Utah. Family and friends may call Monday evening from 6-8 pm at the Hillcrest 2nd Ward Chapel and also on Tuesday morning from 10:00 to 10:45 am prior to services. Funeral Directors - Warenski Funeral Home.

Another past funny favorite titled, my sweet barf baby!

A lil' look back at London & some of my all time fav videos- this ones titled I hate that Binki!

This describes my week perfectly...

I started out the morning pretty normal with giving London her daily bath etc.. but I had let her walk around in the living room strutting her bare bum & all for around two minutes or so before getting her dressed. Nothing too suspicious or out of the ordinary happened and we went about our day. Then later, I kept smelling poop so I decided to retrace her steps from earlier, just in case. Nothing was found... well that afternoon as she was napping, I decided to clean up my closet and this is what I found...

I thought... that lil' stinker!! Literally.

The moral of the story is:

No matter how "crappy" your week is, all you can do is laugh it off and keep on smiling!

Cause lets be honest, we all know it's usually out of our control anyway. I'm just secretly hoping this week isn't as full of as many suprises as last week! :)

Boy am I glad this weeks over!

Ok so this is our latest week of adventures..

London came home looking like this after a few hours with her dad at Chuckie Cheese! Black eye, swollen bleeding forhead and possibly a good scar now to prove it. :( It was honestly the saddest thing I've witnessed yet in her short life .. and now I get it. How sad it is as a parent to see your kids hurt or hurting! I thought .. gosh how did my parents survive us growing up? haha I dont think I will do very well seeing her hurt or sick or heaven forbid anything bad should ever happen to my baby! I m pretty sure it hurt momma just as bad if not more than her.. lol. But there is a happy ending to this sad story and through it all she is a lil trooper, happy and smiling now! I gave her a big cookie and as you can see below I think it cured the bumps and bruises from Chuckie freakin Cheese!

After the cookie with a big smile! :) just like her momma.. nothin like yummy sugar obsessions to make you feel better!

Of course the next day we just had to go out and buy her the cutest pink fourwheeler for all of our upcoming easter and summer festivities. She loves it and to say the least, that makes mom happy, nothin like seeing your child smile and laugh to cure any bad day!

A day in the sun!

Okay so I've officially decided.. I post more pics of my daughter than anyone I know.. facebook, blog etc. So Im sorry people maybe Im a lil obsessed but I just can't help it, she's my first and only and is getting more adorable everyday, do you blame me?!
We went to Moab this weekend and had a blast, even got sunburnt! How great is that? I am so ready to go camping I can taste it. Bring on the summer already, I mean honestly I am so tired of winter at this point. I need a lil sunshine in my life besides London everyday ;) I can hardly wait for this summer, its going to be a fun one.. camping, fourwheeling, jeeping, fishing, hiking, lake powell, swimming and some vacations.. possibly even to British Columbia! I CANNOT wait. So lets do it already Mother Nature, bring it on! Here's a few of London loving life outside.. this is a first for her you know.. let the exploring begin!

Need I say anymore? I mean really....

"Uh, ya mom I'm that cute!"

"I'm soo big"

"my funny face"

"cheese!"

"eyeeee..."

"I love to hear myself scream sometimes.. its ok & perfectly normal momma!"